We are all going to die. It is only a matter of when and how. Barring suicide, we do not have much control over the timing, yet the how of death is something we can change.

I see people die in the Intensive Care Unit all the time. In many cases, death as an outcome is not a surprise. Often, it becomes obvious days or even weeks ahead that the patient is not going to survive. Even then, many patients go through multiple tests, invasive procedures and treatments in the last days of their lives without obtaining any clear benefit on the quality of life or life span.

I see patients die in agony, pain, distress and confusion. I see families unable to decide what to do for their loved ones. Even worse, I see family members squabbling about what grandpa would want when they should be focusing on providing him comfort and peace.
I do not consider this as a good death.

I probably have never seen a good death. Dying at home, surrounded by loved ones and, most importantly, being at peace with death is what I consider a good death.

Not all of us will have the luxury of knowing that death is coming. People die in accidents. People die from heart attacks and unexpected acute illnesses. Yet, based on statistics, most of us will know when it’s coming.

Somebody once told me that often people die just like they lived their lives. I didn’t believe it first. Having spent several years in the Intensive Care Unit, I am becoming a believer.